after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
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I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
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How does one acquire holy water?
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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