So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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