Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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