Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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