Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
