college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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