piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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