So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize