Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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