My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Randomize