when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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