Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize