I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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