Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
We were destined to go to rehab together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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