No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
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Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
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wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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