so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize