I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
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Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
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I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
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