I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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