dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
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angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
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I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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