my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Its about making memories worth repressing
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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