I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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