nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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