I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Randomize