also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
True college students do jello shots in the library
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