My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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