she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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