I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
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We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
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Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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