Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
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I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
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thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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