Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize