im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
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Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
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Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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