So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
two words: eviction party
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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