a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I still have a little drunk in my system
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god it's open bar.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize