Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
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