it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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