We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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