woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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