rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize