Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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