Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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