Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize