ya dads aren't the best wingmen
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize