Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
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