A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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