I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize