i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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