how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize