I forgot how hot balto sounded
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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