That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
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