Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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