Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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